I Just Miss You

I tried to grasp all the remaining
Hold on tight on what's left
But everything you said just made me angrier.

I tried to calm down
And wish this anger just flown away
Coz I don't want to lose you
Just because of this stupid feeling.

Please don't make things worse
And keep saying that hurt me
I just miss you
That's all
And it hurts to know that I can't be near you.

Friends are Forever

Yup, they are.... no matter where you meet them; fun child in kindergarten, primary school, rebellious years in secondary school and university life.... they are always the same, a friend. What's different between all of them are how close you are to them and how comfortable are you with them.

I don't remember much about my friends in kindegarten (in fact, I don't remember at all) but mostly (80%) of my primary school were at my secondary school. Sometimes you don't know they are actually at your primary school, only at secondary school you knew them (that's like me & Zainal case). There also those who were your best friends in primary school but when you were in secondary school, everybody was making their own ways.

Then there's Asasi friends who I'm very close for one whole year. Then after that, everybody continued their studies, the contact was lost. Everybody busy in their own world.

Then came university life which full of colours. More friends you met and from different background. Some you can tolerate but some was pure annoyance. This is the hardest part of friendship coz at this age you are not naive and innocent like the schooling years. You have grown up and you know what you want. At this moment you must know how to judge a person whether they are sincere with their friendship or they just want to use you. At this moment, you learnt the truth about life. And it's sucks.

Friends that always stay in my heart (even though I don't know what happen to them right now) would be: Nadira - my best friend from standard 2 to 5. Suraya in standard 6. Not forgetting Nur'Ain, Aidya, Junaidah, Hana, Aimi, Su Ann, Joel & Arfah. Then in secondary school- the Spice Girl/911/BSB/all the pop stars la gang - Suraya, Tameena, Farhana, Aimi, Faraha, Dini, Zafirah & Shauna. Then upper secondary (dah siuman sikit la) - the solehah chicks (God, I hate this name) - Faraha, Nadhirah, Sharain, Arfah, Intan, Mas, Sara & Liyana. Not forgetting the 4/5 Setians girls - Faraha (lagi!), Farah, Suhaila & Lisa. Yup along the way... the Al-Amin guys (they the one who gave us the solehah chicks name) -you know who you are, ramai sgt la nak cakap; just to mention few, Zainal, Shahnon, Faisal, Mazlan & Amri. Then at Asasi - Jarinah, Safiyah, Yana & Nazihah. And Izni, Izaida, Aryani & Lyan. Then at Engineering - the Tengs - Azliya, Yonz, Maizura, Anida, Farahiyah & Linda. And the AKIUM people- Peja, Muzammil, Masni, all the exco la. (wooo... letihnye linking everybody ni)

God, I miss all of them. Wishing all the best to all of you...

Ps: just received this evening that one of my friend in Asasi, Rohaizad, died this morning of blood infection. May you rest in peace. And let's give her Al-Fatihah. Al'Fatihah.... (Still in shock about the news... she was a sweet girl and very smart too)

The Search Is Finally Over

Finally, after 4 interviews, I managed to find the job that I can relate myself into. Not the perfect job since I haven't started and God knows how I will be working later, but at this moment, I like what I got. Getting up in the morning, all dressed up in the corporate suit with matching high heels and handbag, rushing in the trains with other fellow busy executives... haha. Funny that I haven't started my job yet, but having this perfect situation in my head without thinking the reality might look ugly than what I dream on. The crowded trains, long standing and mad rush hour is not one of my consideration. Let the girl dream will ya.

I got a job at marcus evans (M) Sdn Bhd. I went for the interview this evening and was immediately offered to become VA executive. marcus evans is a event management company which produces exhibitions, congress, conference and training around the world. A London-based company and KL become the Asia Pacific hub. Basically my job is to research who should come to the events and call to invite them to the events. If I was doing really well, I might be sent there for the event (which include Dubai, Jakarta, Bangkok etc). Wow, can I achieve that target? We'll see.

I will be starting next week with 3 days sales training. It's 5 days a week job and 8.30-5.30pm job. That's what I like about it. No need to travel around and confusing shift. Am I ready? Of course. Have been shopping with my mom this evening with new working clothes and shoes and handbag of course (though that bag wasn't for working purpose initially).

Anyway, wish me luck on my new job... Ciao.

This Holiday Must Stop

At one point, you start to think that this holiday should stop right now. The days of waking up late and watching stupid box should end and serious life should begin right now. This wake up call came today when life become so lonely when all the holiday gangs finished their holiday. With Naqib and Zainal started their classes, it just left of me staring into spaces alone at home. Faraha asked to come to her house, well, maybe sometimes this week I'll go.

Many cover letters and resumes have send out last week, one has called back (that's remind me to call marcus evans to make appointment for interview), Haagen Dazs will call tomorrow for the result (I keep my finger cross for this job... getting this job mean cheaper ice cream!!), 1 job has been rejected by everybody around me except me (kena ikut je la ckp, karang anything happen, nobody wants to help) and more resume will be sent.

This holiday is not what I have in mind. Wanted to go holiday at islands and beaches but can't coz of unavoidable circumtances. Well, maybe next time though.

Final word: Bosan.

There was a Fish...

There was a fish who was born to be eaten by another fish. She was bought with hundreds of her kind and put into an aquarium with 2 hungry turtles. Lucky star must be shining bright on her as the turtles didn't eat her. It was a miracle coz that 2 carnivorous creatures never let anything that can be eaten alive in front of them. Soon the 3 of them became friends till the end.

She was named Jap. She was lucky to have that name compared to other turtles who have weird names; too weird to mention here. She grew bigger and ate whatever the turtles ate.

But conflict occured in the owner household and one of the turtles was taken from that aquarium. Until these days, nobody knew what happened to that turtle. Jap left with heartbroken turtle. The turtle grieved for the lost of his friend and refused to eat. Jap forced the turtle to eat by shoving the food to the turtle. A year later, the turtle died coz of depression.

So left Jap alone in the aquarium. The owner tried to replace the 2 turtles by putting another 2 small turtles but they died after few weeks. Apperently Jap didn't like them. Jap was strong. For almost 2 years, she actually lived by eating turtle pellets.

Finally, the morning of 24 June 2006, Jap was seeing struggling in the water. It was obvious that it was her final moment. She was trying to breath but with difficulty. When the owner came back in the afternoon, clearly Jap was gone forever. The sad part was she didn't even had a chance to get a proper burial as that Indonesian woman who don't understand the meaning of pets, throw her away and let the stupid black cat ate her. That's the end of 5 years of Jap's life.

Footnote: This is true story and I know it sound melodramatic but this actually the first pet that I 100% responsible to. I used to wish that Jap died after the second turtle died coz she's not exactly the wanted pet and it will burden me but now I felt sad when she's gone. It was bad enough to watch her dying when you cannot do anything and it worst when people threw her away as if she was nothing. My big room felt eerily silent without the splashing sound of the aquarium water filter (and another occupant of my room also has gone to enter his tertiary education which make the matter worse) and I still can't stop the habit of looking at the aquarium everytime I walk past. This is so melancholy but this is how I felt today. First time I actually cried for the lost of a pet. Jap, In Memory... Who once an unwanted fish but now she was deeply missed...

CT of the Brain

Has not been updated recently because my house phone line was down and streamyx also went kaput. (pasal dah addicted sgt dgn net, terpaksa guna my 3G today to access the net. Habis la bill bulan ni.)

Btw, this is my report:

3 mm sections done for the posterior fossa and 8 mm sections for the rest of the brain.

The ventricles are normal in size and configuration.
No midline shift.
The brain parenchyma is normal.
Normal brain stem and cerebellum.
No mass or intracranial bleed. I
mpression: Normal CT of the brain.

Alhamdulillah.

Collecting Stuff

Everybody likes to collect something in their life. When we were small, we always said that we love collecting stamps... sometimes I wonder if everybody actually collect stamps? I know I did, just 1 album la. But that one also was not really collected coz I bought all the stamps and just compiled it in the album. Then as we grew older we started to collect something else. Some collect story books, comics, animes, figurines and some collects hot chicks. Some older men collect wives. Hehe. Not forgetting those who collect friends and enemies along the way.

I like to collect shoes. Yes, I know every women loves shoes and handbags. So am I. And I like to collect books and manga too. I used to collect eraser but I think I lost it after I changed my cupboard. I used to have different kind of eraser, from normal ones, the one with eyes that can moves and one that can dismantle to form another thing. Interesting right. Right now I have this collection that drove my mom crazy... collecting empty boxes. At one time, my mom threw all the boxes, but now I managed to collect a few back. Huhu.

However, lately I've been collecting thing that I don't want to collect; common and uncurable disease. I've got asthma, sinusitus, gastric pain and the latest edition, migraine (I just discovered yesterday after a trip to a neurologist) under my name. Hmmm.... have to do head scan tomorrow morning to make sure I don't have any weird things in my head (beside my imaginations and ideas). Wish me luck.

Here We Go... Ole ole ole

The World Cup fever is back. The sleepless night and confusion between time zone in Malaysia and Germany has infected Malaysian men and women too. Even though I'm not a fanatic footie, but I watched this once in the 4 years event religiously and keep ahead with the latest news . Yes, thanks the all the men around me; abah, Naqib & Zainal, for the info and latest news (this is what happen if you're the only girl in the family). Now I can know it's an offside by looking at it after Naqib taught me nearly 10 times. And I know how to bet also.... Hehe.

My favourite team is Argentina!! This 2 times champion has big names like Messi, Rodriguez, Crespo and Saviola is one of the Pele's choice for this year World Cup. Not mentioning my favourite player, Pablo Aimar is also in the team (even though he's not in the first team), a 1997 FIFA World Youth winner and creative footballer who helped Valencia to win many titles. Hopefully they play well this year unlike in 2002 where they managed until the group stage only. Next group that I place my bet is Brazil. They really joga bonita when they play in the field.

I will watch games that show at 9pm and 12am, but 3am.... will think about it la. Maybe semi and final I will try to stay up with Naqib.

Got to stop now, Netherlands vs Serbia & Montenegro is already taking off.

Interview 1.0

Since I just finished my degree and as usual, I should start looking for a job. So let's look the journey to get a job and how many interview I have to go through.

Yesterday I went my first interview since the holiday started. It was at Sunway Group for management training under SMART programme. Hmm... I applied that at Career Path UM and I think Leen applied with me too. (Betul ke? Yg kita dpt mouse pad free tu kan?).
Anyway, I already forgot that I applied this when the company called me for interview. So I just went there to try my luck. I thought the interview was simple and quick. But then I discover it has a tentative programme for that particular day. It started with the presentation from HR director. Then came the nerve breaking part where each of us has to introduce ourselves and tell everybody what are the biggest achievement of your life. And... there are around 10 of the interviewer from various company under Sunway Group's representatives watching and evaluating us from behind. Finding one achievement is hard enough but hearing people's achievement can shrink your self esteem. There's many students (including few from UM in mech engineering) who stated their academic achievement as straight dean's list in 4 years of study. Not mentioning a structural engineer who doing her master and at the same time she always teaches latin dance (talk about multi talent people). Then there's people with degree of financial engineering (that's the first time I heard about it). At the end I just talked what I think I appropriate la.

Then we had to answer 3 set of paper. (Teringat kat PTD exam yg baru amik hari ni). The first want was the personal test la, biase la tu, second one was about what our interest, and the last one was the most '....' (I can't find any word to describe that). We had to write a story about 150-200 words based on the picture given. And there's 6 pictures, so 6 story to write. Waaahhh... memang keluar la semua kemahiran imiginasi yang selama ni disia-siakan, ade juga faedahnya. Huhu.

We even had tea break. (The curry puff was delicious). Now I know why they gave us the mouse pad. Diorang mmg kaya la. Lastly, of course, the interview part. Mine took 45 minutes. And all the questions were mostly about you should find one achievement you did, then tell what you did to achieve that, what the problem you occured, the resolution and result. (Bila balik rumah baru abah cakap tu concept sama macam dia guna masa kat Kimberly-Clark dulu. Ceh, apsal tak cakap awal. Punye la praktis bende yang langsung dier tak tanya). I think I did okay in the interview. The HR director was very nice.

I keep my finger cross for this job. Macam best je. They said that 1300 actually applied and they shortlisted to 60 only. Bangga pulak dapat shortlisted. But mostly Chinese la. On my batch itself, around 20 people, only 2 Malays, tu pun sorang lg tetiba balik half way. I think dunno why. Hmmm... kalau dapat keje ni, dapat la diskaun Sunway Lagoon Resort Hotel and Sunway Lagoon. Huhu. But overall, klau dapat ni memang best la. Dekat dengan rumah pulak tu. Hehe.

Tribute to Mr Z

This post is tributed to Zainal for saving me from rushing home from interview and become the virus killer of our home.

ps: ni post ikhlas tau. hehe.

New Layout

This is my third skin. Not so much changes except the background and position of the columns. The background picture guess who is she? Hehe... ~moi~

At the small details will correct it later coz I'm sleepy already...

Anyway, can anybody help me how to erase the grey bar with the imagebucket things there. It's an eyesore la. Please...please...please...

Please feel free to comment this skin.

KL International Motor Show 2006

Went to KL International Motor Show yesterday. Forgot that now is school holiday and there were a lot of kids who actually didn't really care why they were they except an opportunity for them to run around. Neway, I got 2 and a half hours of walking exercise plus various of cars to be gaped around.

I think this year motor show was not as exciting as the last 2 years'. I dunno, it just lacks of something. Less modified cars and well, less 'brand ambassador' aka the sexy model. Hehe. But the appearence of Honda's ASIMO was something interesting. Before this I only watched him in action in the net but yesterday managed to watch him live doing the wonders of artificial intelligence. Wow, can't believe the smoothness of that robot's movements.

Anyway, here's few picture from the motor show.

The 70s groovy car. Check out inside of the car. With disco ball! (me with the model...she's not friendly though, maybe she was to guys only, ceh)

My future car, SLR McLaren. Huhu.

Smartfortwo Brabus yang comel. Ok, I have a thing with Brabus cars. Maybe the fact that it only produce 9000 cars per year? Or that businessman that bought the B class with the price tag of RM 1.38 m? or both. Lastly.... Wonder on Wheels...Ferrari
....Bentley