Balancing the Emotions

Current tense situation in the gang has remind me of the situation I've been in few years ago. It's a conflict of heart interest and social life.

I know that some of my friends didn't like who I chose. They tried to tell politely and I appreciated that. On the other hand, my heart interest didn't like my acquaintance. For him, they ruined our relationship.

I was torn in the middle. At one moment, I was willing to give up my love interest to satisfy the other side. I saw them everyday, so apparently they managed to brainwash me easily. Until one day I woke up and realized what I really want. I want both sides. He makes me happy and they are my friends. So I promised myself to follow my heart, not others.

I resorted to balance both parties. It was hard, I remembered that well. Both side was codemning each other. So if one side hurted me, the other side would take the advantage to attack the other one. At the end, I was the hurted one by those cruel words. I really want to work for both parties. But usually it's easier to convince him than them.

And of course people don't understand that he is important to you as much as they are important to you. It's up to you to make them understand. You have to balance like a professional juggler. It takes time and just pekakkan telinga.

At the end of my story, each parties have to accept that both of them are important to me in different aspects. And I tried not to involve both of them in one situation. Therefore, I live happily ever after.

Nasi lemak buah bidara
Sayang selasih hamba lurutkan
Buang emak buang saudara
Kerana kekasih hamba turutkan.

Risk in Exam

We take risk in life. Life without risk is not challenging and we don't feel the goodness of life.

Taking risk in exam is another thing. Today I took risk for Superconductivity paper by reading only past year paper. I memorized the past year only. If my lecturer asked something that not from past year, kirim salam je la. The truth is past year pun dah nak muntah menghafal.

Before this, I had taken the risk for another paper. That paper was totally high risk la. It's Electromagnetic with a lots of unlogic calculation (for me la). If I miscalculate my risk, I might failed that paper miserably. I remember Kak Farah told me that she won't take that risk with me coz that was high risk. But I managed to get A eventually. Hehe. (Masa nak exam tu menggigil tangan buka question paper).

There's a few steps of gambling in exam. There's no random pick what to study. It needs few past years paper (for Supercon case, only 1 past year) and you must analyse the lecturer. In Electromagnet case, we can see that he always skip a year before returning to the same question. For Supercon case, the 1 past year is already covered almost whole subject. So generally that's how I did la. (Boleh berlagak plak mentang2 dah final sem).

But sometimes, this whole gambling thing is unsuccessful. I remember we thought that this particular lecturer was not going to change the questions, since she's so busy becoming the head department and all that. During the exam, everybody cried reading her questions. The questions not even close to the past years. All fresh and new. Padan muka!

Then, there's one time this lecturer actually told not to read this topic and we happily ignored it. It turns out 20 marks from that particular topic only. Hmmm... How we want to trust the lecturer.

Well, I got another 3 papers before I finally finish my 4 years of undergrad education. Wish me luck!

Side story: I risked eating lunch at college today, and what I got? Angry words and sour face. Sorry...

Makro - The Last Place to Shop

Makro used to the only hypermarket back then. Carrefour, Giant and Tesco weren't opened yet. I used to follow my parents but had to wait outside since Makro had this no entry for under 12 policy. It used to be hard to get a Makro membership. I remember some people actually had to borrow someone's else just to get in.

Then the birth of these 3 other hypermarket has at least help other people who wants to buy food for their family only, not the whole neighbourhood. You don't even need to be membership and 1 day baby can go in. At that moment, Makro has lost it's touched. Abang siap buang kad Makro dalam sungai mane tah (ke longkang?).

But today I went to Makro since I saw a paper shredder that Mak always wanted. (She does not specific any brand but the Makro's advertisements look ok). So Zainal and I went there. (Since Zainal wanted to impress my mom). Mak said no need the Makro card, just give your IC and that's ok. We found out that we need to fill out the form and (yay!) I add my collection of junk card.

Next, trying to pull (not push) the trolley. The trolley wasn't human friendly at all and we ended up knocking ourselves and others. Then, after choosing a paper shredder (it wasn't hard coz there's only 2 choices) we went to the food section (read: chocolate and junk food). It was hard to choose 1 food coz we have to think if we really want to eat 20 boxes of that particular food. After 3 rounds, we managed to choose Rocky, biscuit stick chocolate, only after we agreed to take 10 boxes each.

After finished picking up 4 items, time to pay. I managed to get Mak permission to use my credit card (that's explained the 20 boxes of chocolate. huhu). But the bad news was, they did not accept credit card except it's Maybank credit card (not even my Citibank which is accepted in more than 70 countries). WTF. At the moment, I was like how am I gonna paid this items? I got only 70 bucks. Luckily Zainal asked if we can used the Maybank ATM card and he have it. Thank God. If not, I have to ditch all the items and went back empty handed.

The moral of the story: Do not shop at Makro again. Even the checklist boy used lame pickup lines. Please la....

Dangerously In Love

Each of us must have experience the effect of crazy love (or people who just fall in love) from the person close to you. It's torturing isn't it. At some moment you feel like slapping her face so that she back to reality. Just read this article in Cosmopolitan (Malaysia version, siap dlm BMelayu lg!! Faraha: gasp!) about this crazy love or gila bayang.

When you fall in love, it would activate a part of your brain that rich in dopamine which make you happy and forget all your sadness. Dopamine also increase the secretion of testosterone which influence you sex instinct. That's why when you fall in love, you feel like... you know. (Mcm dlm filem Hollywood...part yg selalu kena potong kat M'sia. Huhu. Try to be an U blog here). Then there are also norepinephrine which will send the sex signal to the brain and increase your memory. That's why you remember what colour his shirt the first time you met him. However, norepinephrine only increase your memory whatever things that related to him and ignore other things around you.

Since you are happy and shiny, the part of the brain which called amygdala will deceased it's activity. Amygdala is the area of worry and anxious. When this happened, you will not think straight and your judgement sometimes can be wrong. That's why there are cases where it's involving someone's husband, lecturers, unknown foreigners and someone's boyfriend. Sometimes the individual would ditch her friends that she knew for years just for a person that just arrive from nowhere.

The fact that our brain is full of dopamine can cause us gila bayang. Then everything about him is always the best. Nobody does better than him. Kalau dia kentut pun bau wangi. And your life isn't calm anymore. (This is because serotonin decrease, which is for calming and peaceful effect in our brain). You start to think about him all the time, you want to meet him all the time and you start to talk about him all the time. (Before you realize, you actually decreased the level of serotonin of your friends who listen to your oh-so-perfect man's life story).

Geez... who said falling in love is good. Look what it has done to our brain. Chaotic and haywire.

Word of advice: Beware of people who are just fall in love.

30 minutes meeting, 90 minutes journey

Waiting can caused harm to our body emotionally and physically.

He waited too long for her to arrive.
She waited 15 minutes for him to come to front gate from his house.

They both become irritated.
When both got irritated, they started to blame each other.
Both not satisfied and started arguing. Then lead to fighting.

And she cried. He called her crybaby.
She wept and mamak forgot her murtabak.

Both stared in silence.
End of 30 minutes meeting.

On the way back, in the middle of traffic jam, flood and raining, he called back.
Everything seems to be fine again.
And she cried again. Of joy and relieved.
Yeah, she's a crybaby (or maybe the period?).

Sunday Morning

I love Sunday morning. Who doesn't isn't it? (except people in Kelantan, Terengganu and Kedah who has to work on Sundays. Pity them). You can get up very late which is almost noon, then eat your breakfast, read the Sunday special newspaper and sleep back till evening. Well, that my perfect Sunday la.

My not so perfect Sunday would involving shopping for groceries at Giant in the evening. I love going to Giant in Sundays. There are a lot of free food sample and you will get full with just trying food sample. At one time, when Naqib and I have to shopping ourselves, we managed to buy 2 new food based on the free sample. Hmmm... I used to eat the instant pau (but it taste like pau+cake) everytime I go to Giant without ever buying that product. It was tasty, yummy. But the downside of Sundays is very crowded and full parking.

My less than not so perfect Sunday would be going to Low Yatt Plaza. The place is crowded with no free food sample and expensive parking. Enough said.

My worst Sunday would consists of bad mood mom, weddings to attend, people coming to the house, dad suddenly force us to go to market (pasar la), Ferrari wins F1, doing incomplete assignments, was force to clean the room and low density keropok lekor (you know the one when you bite, you feel nothing but air inside - the one that sold by I-am-a-terengganuian-and-every-people-in-terengganu-know-how-to-make-keropok-lekor-so-I-make-and-sell-it-too-even-though-i-know-it-taste-like-shit).

Life Without Computer

Ever wonder how our life without computers? You know, like our grandma's old days. Must be wonderful right. No virus to hate, no worry about losing your thumbdrive, no envy because your friend has more powerful pc, no tears to lose coz your didn't save your work and your pc hanged, no need to wasted money on buying all the computer stuff, no headache wondering why your computer didn't start, no worrying if there's thunder, no streamyx bill to pay, no hassle to bring your laptop everywhere in case someone steal it, no worry that your children would visit porn site, no more heat discussion (or should I say gaduh) about it at someone else's blog and no 'saya tak pernah jumpa orang yang sebanyak masalah computer macam awak' thing.

If I not mistaken, this is the third time I complained about my computer since this blog was launched. I was not trying to hate computers actually, hating computer is like betraying my engineering background. Its just that I don't understand why my computer hates me so much. Why don't he pick Naqib. It would be easier for me to blame someone else aight.

Anyway, computer means differently to different person. Some entitle their pc as their first wife (this goes to all the computer geek... huhu... mesti ada orabg terasa baca ni), some doesn't need computer (like my bibik and my grandma) and most of us use computer to ease our life (not mine, I presumed).

I just hope that I will not spend more money at that pc. And gonna miss this laptop as it will send back to where she (I think it's a female coz she so delicate yet strong, like women) belongs....