Today is the 10th day Pak in hospital. And today at 12 pm, I still at home which is unusual for the past 10 days. Supposedly I should be at hospital. But today I just couldn't take the latest nuisance from people who came to visit. Because she is my family. I expect family to understand but instead she making bunyi-bunyi yang menyakitkan hati on days like this.
Pak was admitted to the ward on 4th of September at 11.30pm. He was brought to the emergency room at 2pm the same day. Doctors took 9 hours to find out what's wrong with him but finally they admitted him despite not knowing what the problem. He showed a symptom of stroke which was slurred speech but the brain scan showed nothing. His motor on both side was in excellent condition which further confused the doctors.
Everyday I was at the hospital without fail. Sometimes I stayed for 12 hours and if other family was there I would went home to take a break. But Pak always asked for me and he felt most comfortable with me so I would tried my best to be there for him.
Pak's health deteriorated rapidly within one week. When he first came in, I can understand him and he can walk if the doctor asked him. Then his speech become unrecognizable even for me. Then they did a MRI scan and they found out that it's pontine stroke. Ya Allah! At that time Pak couldn't even talk anymore. He even needed oxygen. But he wasn't comfortable with the oxygen mask and the pulse oxymeter at his finger tip. He wanted to take it off and was restless for at least 3 days. He was at that condition and didn't feel comfortable with whatever that happen around him. Few times nurses have to tied his hands to his bed to make sure he wouldn't hurt himself. That was the saddest thing I ever seen. He would look at me with sadness in his eyes begging me to untie his hand. He couldn't talk and he is at other people's mercy. And all I can do is comfort him with holding his hand. That's all I can do. I felt useless.
Then on 9th September, he has difficulty of breathing. He was breathing heavily with the help of oxygen mask. At that time, his oxygen level was barely reached 90%. His heart rate was at the average of 120 bpm. He looked like he has to fight for his life to breathe. At that time, he can't even raised his hand. He was so weak and he just closed his eyes all the time. When people came and hold his hand, he opened his eyes and if that person meant a lot to him, tears rolled at the corner of his eyes.
Finally on the Eid night, doctor decided to put him on a ventilator. On Eid morning when I came and visited him, he was unconscious and still breathing supported by ventilator. Now on the 5th of Eid, he still unconscious.
Pak was admitted to the ward on 4th of September at 11.30pm. He was brought to the emergency room at 2pm the same day. Doctors took 9 hours to find out what's wrong with him but finally they admitted him despite not knowing what the problem. He showed a symptom of stroke which was slurred speech but the brain scan showed nothing. His motor on both side was in excellent condition which further confused the doctors.
Everyday I was at the hospital without fail. Sometimes I stayed for 12 hours and if other family was there I would went home to take a break. But Pak always asked for me and he felt most comfortable with me so I would tried my best to be there for him.
Pak's health deteriorated rapidly within one week. When he first came in, I can understand him and he can walk if the doctor asked him. Then his speech become unrecognizable even for me. Then they did a MRI scan and they found out that it's pontine stroke. Ya Allah! At that time Pak couldn't even talk anymore. He even needed oxygen. But he wasn't comfortable with the oxygen mask and the pulse oxymeter at his finger tip. He wanted to take it off and was restless for at least 3 days. He was at that condition and didn't feel comfortable with whatever that happen around him. Few times nurses have to tied his hands to his bed to make sure he wouldn't hurt himself. That was the saddest thing I ever seen. He would look at me with sadness in his eyes begging me to untie his hand. He couldn't talk and he is at other people's mercy. And all I can do is comfort him with holding his hand. That's all I can do. I felt useless.
Then on 9th September, he has difficulty of breathing. He was breathing heavily with the help of oxygen mask. At that time, his oxygen level was barely reached 90%. His heart rate was at the average of 120 bpm. He looked like he has to fight for his life to breathe. At that time, he can't even raised his hand. He was so weak and he just closed his eyes all the time. When people came and hold his hand, he opened his eyes and if that person meant a lot to him, tears rolled at the corner of his eyes.
Finally on the Eid night, doctor decided to put him on a ventilator. On Eid morning when I came and visited him, he was unconscious and still breathing supported by ventilator. Now on the 5th of Eid, he still unconscious.
2 comments:
i'm at the brink of tears reading this.. praying that it all went well.. be strong.
Thank you... Trying my best to be strong especially in front of him.
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