27th May is over and let's the fun begin

The old me is back. The one that procrastinates to reply emails, FB messages and hates online chatting. That old me I called it 'Mun in Malaysia and surrounding by her loved ones'. Mun in US, alone, away, lonely and bored was efficient when replying email (well, sort of) and looking forward to chat with someone (well, almost everyone).

Sorry dear friends. =)

Anyway, 27th of May was over. The promise of fun and jalan-jalan will begin today.

Today and tomorrow's agenda will be revolved around GSC where 5 movies have been reserved under our name. My hubby and I are partners in watching movie. So when we stayed apart for 3 months, each of us only watched 1 movie at cinema with our friends. The rest was downloaded or just missed it. Now we are back together, our weekly movie date will be continued again. See, how loyal are we to each other. Nak tengok movie pun kena sama-sama... haha.

Saturday is the day to pack our stuff and attend briefing of the trip.

On Sunday we will heading to Dayang Island for our first scuba diving trip for 6 days. I expect to receive a license at the end of this trip. At least open water if not the advanced one. But so lazy to practice swimming and build my stamina.

And the following week will start my internship for 2 months. *Sigh*

Coming back home

Finally my body is accustomed to Malaysia time. So I'm at my tanahair for 5 days already. Having a blissful time with my husband even though he has exams straight until next Wednesday. I don't mind as long as I'm with him. Even though I'm happy with my current situation but I still need to write down the experience I had during my journey back to Malaysia.

It started with a day before I was going home. I was supposed to return my lease car that evening but got lost while going there. I called the company to inform that I was lost and I might probably arrived late and please wait for me. But when I arrived there, they already closed and left me in the dark. What really pissed me off was I called to inform that I was late and pity my landlady who followed me to bring me home. I had to apologize to her many times for wasting her time and gas.

This event has lead to another problem for me as I have to catch a plane the next day and I have to settle this car before I went home. So early morning I had to ask my friend to pick me at Chapel Hill and send me home before I have to rush to airport.

Arrived at Raleigh/Durham International Airport, NC 1 hour 20 minutes before flight, rushed to check in, unpacked few pounds of overweight luggage and ran to the gate. After security checks, I thought everything went well.

Board the plane and arrived at Charlotte Douglas International Airport,NC at almost 2 pm. My next flight to Newark Airport, New Jersey (I don't know why people always thought this airport is in New York. It's not, it's in New Jersey and MAS only come here and Los Angeles Airport) was at 2.50pm. Then I found out that my flight was delayed to 4 pm. From Charlotte to Newark was around 2 hours flight so I probably arrived around 6 pm which gave me around 4 hours before my flight to Kuala Lumpur. Well, it's fine with me.

So I just hanging around at the gate eating tasteless chinese food and reading Sophie Kinsella's while watching people. 10 minutes before 4 pm I checked the display board at the gate and found out it was delayed to 4.30pm. Then after more waiting, they announced that we will board the aircraft at 5.15 pm and departed at 5.30 pm. I was restless at this time. My friend from Miami has arrived in Newark and I told him that I was delayed. He said never mind and be patient.

But then I found out that the flight was delayed again to 6.30 pm. If delayed to 6.30 pm, I'll be arriving in Newark at 8.30 pm which is less than 2 hours before my flight to KUL. I asked US Airways staff at the counter what's the problem that we have so many delays. She said because of the weather in Newark but when I said my friend had arrived there safely with no weather problem, she just dismissed me and walked away. I was furious at that time.

So I went to US Airways special services counter to ask if I can make it to my next flight. This time around the flight has been delayed to 7.30 pm. At this rate, I knew I might not make it to my next plane. The guy was so rude and all he said was he couldn't do anything and life must go on. WTH? Life must go on? (I remembered this clearly). I was tired, angry and PMS so I ran to a toilet and cried. Really hard.

I didn't know what to do at this point. I was away from my house (Charlotte to Durham is 3 hours away), I didn't know anybody at Charlotte and if I board the plane to Newark and missed the flight to KL, where should I stayed? The next flight from Newark to KL was 2 days away.

I called my friend that arrived in Newark and all he could do was tell the MAS officer that there is another girl that will arrived late. But what if I arrived later that 10 pm? Will the plane wait for me? Obviously no.

My mom called and I cried harder. She asked me to go to the US Airways to re-route me so that I can arrive Newark before 10 pm. He still said no and became even ruder than before.

Then I went to the US Airways ticketing counter and while waiting for my queue looking like shit after half hour crying, an Indian asked me where I'm from. I said I'm a Malaysian and I'm going home. Immediately he said he's a Malaysian too and he's in the same flight with me going back to Malaysia. He said, "Jangan menangis adik. I have a family here, we can go back to my house after we settle all of this."

At that moment I felt like Allah has send me helps in subtle ways. He canceled my ticket for KL, re-booked the ticket for Saturday and spoke for me all the way. Then he called his wife to pick us and bring us home.

Apparently his wife also a Malaysian but they have lived in US for almost 20 years. He wanted to go back to Malaysia after 6 years not visiting his family and now this stuff happened. He was angry too.

To tell the truth, he and his family was my life saver. I'm so grateful for meeting him and his family. They are such a wonderful people and I'm going to visit them when I go back this August.

So after buying new ticket to Malaysia and wasted USD380 on the canceled ticket, postponed my trip home by 2 days, I finally home. What a journey coming back home.

Ps: I won't take US Airways anymore after this. Period.

Tired and confused

I want to update this blog.

I want to tell the experience of coming back home - how I was stranded in an airport, how I met a Malaysian who saved my life and only arrived home 2 days later than I was supposed to.

I want to share the happiness of seeing my family and beloved husband again.

But my body in weird time zone jet lag. Right now it doesn't follow any time zone. Neither nor US eastern time or Malaysian time. I got so sleepy at 4 pm and sleep through until 10 pm which is not my sleeping time in US.

Apakah?

Packing headache

I always underestimate my things when I planned for packing. Late last year who would thought that 1 year in rented apartment equivalent to 1 lorry and 2 cars full loaded with stuff. That was not including items that we gave away.

Now the same problem arise again. Initially I thought I would need 3 boxes at most. 2 for books and notes and 1 plastic box for clothes that I won't bring home (aka winter clothes). But now, 6 boxes later, I still have my stuff that haven't been packed yet. WTH?

Seriously, how much things that can be accumulate when I just stayed here for 5 months only? But, it's still unbelievable. I have 1 box for winter coats only and 1 box for shoes only (in my defense, 3 pairs of it it's not mine).

Unfortunately I have another problem to solve beside one that still unsolved. The first unsolved one is my luggage might be overweight. I don't know yet coz... this is where the second problem comes, it couldn't be closed!! Because of overload. I know, I'm in the deep shit now. Now, I do what I excel at, complain at my blog. *sigh* but haha.

The best mother on earth

Today is Mother's Day and like any other event that happened this year, I'm not be able to celebrate it with the person I'm suppose to be celebrated with.

Mother's sacrifice would never be paid back no matter how much money you give to them. This year my mom reminded me of her endless sacrifices to her children no matter how old they are. To her, they are still her baby and need to be protected all the time.

After Mak knew that Zainal couldn't send me to the States late last year, she voluntarily announced that she would send me. She said she has save some money that can be used for tickets and hotels while she's there. At that moment, only God knows how happy I was to have someone that accompany me for this long journey. Little I knew that this journey was more than just accompanying me.

I arrived here in States without any confirm accommodation. The first 2 days we lived in university inn and after finding a room, we moved there. From my rented room to the nearest bus stop required 0.9 miles of walking distance. The bus that we took at that bus stop didn't go direct to campus but we have to change to another bus at downtown. Imagine for 8 days in the peak of winter time, my 60 years old mother had to walk in winter to bus stop and waited for 30 minutes for the bus to come in drizzling rain just accompanied me whether to campus or grocery shopping.

How do I repay her sacrifice of following me to the campus so that I won't missed the orientation that held at late evening and finished at night time. How she would sat at a corner reading her book while waiting for me. How she gave me her muffler when she saw me shivering in the cold winter rain while waiting for bus. How she had to replace 2 weeks of classes she canceled just for this trip. How during this 10 nights she motivated me to study hard and finally saw me broke down 2 days before she left when the thought of living here alone in this harsh condition finally took its toll on me.

After she arrived home, for 2 months she never failed to call me every morning to remind me that I'm not alone and updated me with the latest news from home so that I will not feel left out. She never angry or disappointed in me even I didn't achieve her expectation instead she would give words of comfort and encouragement to make me feel better. I confided her all my happiness and sadness and as I grow into a young woman, she's my best friend.

She is my idol. I don't need another figure to be role model for me when I have my mother. She cooks the best dishes (and so many varieties), can sew perfectly (alteration is nothing for her as she could saw an evening dress for me), arrange floral decorations in minutes (that's why we have 10 floral decorations at living hall only and she was popular person at wedding preparation as she can transform boring looking flower arrangement into something beautiful), she can design hantaran and bunga telur with back of her hand (she did my brother's 1500 bunga telur while she was a Deputy VC at UPSI and all my bunga telur for both akad nikah & reception by her self), has doctorate, professorship and various awards from the Sultans under her name. How she balanced of being a great mother, wife, and academician is still a wonder to me.

She showed me the greatest love and loyalty of a wife can give to her husband during the worst of his life that amazed me. She showed me the unconditional love of a mother, no matter what her children said or did to her. She showed me the patience of being a daughter of an aging mother whose really tested the composure and calmness of a person.

She said I'm like her and one day I'll follow her. At my current stage of life, I still doubt about her statement but I am glad if I can be half of her greatness. But I do hope that her prayer will come true and therefore I have to work hard to achieve the same level with her. (oh, I could feel the pressure already)

For this, happy mother's day, Mak. You are the best and I love you so much.

How she always loves flowers and I hope the roses will bloom as beautiful as now (or better) next year when she will come for my graduation.

We are 7 baby!

Yes, we are celebrating 7th anniversary today. Seven years as his girlfriend (yeah, we made it official early last year but I'm still his girlfriend for life) and 70 more years or whenever Malakul-Maut comes. And I pray we will continue our love in heaven Insya Allah.

Yes, wedding anniversary is so overrated. People celebrated wedding anniversaries coz it's an arranged marriage. Haha.

We celebrated our union of love when we started dating and continue counting as we get married. Or we just celebrate both. =)

I love this date, 7th May, coz it's the middle of our birthday. I'm 4th May, he's 14th May, yeah you got me, 9th should be the middle between 4 & 14 but wth. So May is the big celebration. His, hers and our day compacted together to form an ultimate celebration. Ok, that was exaggerated.

Anyway, enough crap, let's pictures showed the journey of us.

This was during my brother's wedding. The first time I introduced him as my bf to my mom. This was back in 2002.
My favourite picture back then which I hanged on my cupboard door in my college room which drive my roommates crazy.

Both of these pictures were in 35mm film camera era.

Then digital camera era rolled in and here goes all funny pictures.

Started with VGA phone camera.This was when we were watching at Starlight Cinema, Bukit Kiara. Did I look like an elder sister to him? Yes, I did. I won't show you the worst picture which I looked like a lecturer dating a student. Aargghh.. (Ni semua Thoreq punya pasal).

The second time we went to Genting but this time with AKIUM. We have this funny relationship with Genting where we like to go there for so many times. Until now I can't figure out why.

Oh, it's so hard to choose pictures from different era... I looked funny...

At Zainal's first convocation. Second one will coming soon. =)

Yea, no glasses anymore. No more I-look-older-than-him-and-I-might-be-his-elder-sister. Hehe... This was few months after LASIK and finally can wear sunglasses!

At Shahnon's sister wedding. I always love this pictures Maybe because we unintendedly wore same colour and smiled happily as if we know..

this going to happen soon....

Our akad nikah on 19 January 2008.

Our reception on 19 July 2008.

This was in NYC 2009. The last weekend I physically spent with him before we'll meet again (not through Skype or dreams) in less than 10 days!

Well, Happy 7th Anniversary Sayang!

Apartment hunting

I'm tired. Tired of apartment hunting and calculating budget. If I have $100 more budget, then the choices would be more. It's hard to balance safety, location, facilities and budget. There are lots of quite cheap apartments near the school but there are also lots of concern about shooting, robbery and larceny. There are lots of safe and nice apartments but my budget would not allow it. Even if I work part time to accommodate the increase.

Then, this car leasing company wants to increase the price if I have new lease. Hate them. Mentang-mentang ramai Duke student use their service, mengada-ngada. Adoi... No car means how am I going to school? Taking city bus is like acting ghetto movie. One day you might be a supporting cast but in unfortunate day, you might be in the front page. WTH is my analogy? Ok, the point is it's dangerous to take the bus alone (references: my mom & Zainal).

Benciss..

Can I just rent a RV? A house and transport in one.

In unrelated incidence, this one Indian shop lied to me about their DVD rental. I missed watching Hindi movie so I rented one. I put deposit $10 and asked him how long can I rent? He said no time limit. Today, 1.5 months later, I wanted to return back and get my deposit, the wife said it's only 3 days and since my rental card has lost by them and it's way long overdue, they didn't want to return my deposit and asked me to keep the DVD. Taknak that DVD.. wants my money back. T_T

Birthday in Uncle Sam's Land

Thank you Allah for giving me another year to live and grow in this world. Officially I'm 26 years old now. Technically I was 26 years old 12 hours ago as I was born in Malaysia not US but since geographically I'm in US, so I'll be using the GMT-0500 to establish my official birthday date.

This year it would be different. This is the first time I celebrated by birthday away from my loved ones and my beloved country. This is new experience for me and I will embrace it positively. I mean why sulk when you can't do anything about it. For a change this is an opportunity for me to see who really remember my birthday without having me physically be there to remember it. Haha.

Anyway, you could not expect every year to be wonderful birthdays right. There would be some special ones and some just plain birthday. I don't have excellent memory but I remember some good things happened in few of my birthdays. Like in 1997, during my last birthday party, I actually received a science kit for my birthday. WTH? Was I that nerd? In 1999, I got this unexpected birthday gift from someone that I have no idea that care about me even though we were not in the same school anymore. In 2002, Zainal asked me to be his girlfriend and boom, 6 years and 362 days later, we are husband and wife. In 2006, that was the first time I actually could celebrated birthday with my Tengs sisters. Before this all my birthdays fell in semester holidays. Sucks I know. In 2008, I celebrated my birthday as a wife for the first time.

Ahh.. remembering all these memories really put a smile on my face tonight. I felt blissful for having these wonderful people surrounding me. I actually didn't mind being alone tonight. I thanked Allah again for the wonderful 26 years of my life. I wouldn't want to trade it with anyone else.

"Reality. It's so much more interesting than living happily ever after." Meredith Grey from Grey's Anatomy.

TV junkie

I'm a TV junkie. No doubt about it. Not having cable in US has caused almost depression for me initially. You see, if you don't have a cable here, you almost didn't get any channel at all. I have a TV in my room which can receive 3 channels only. The most clearest one is the one that similar to TV Pendidikan in Malaysia. The only channel I watched was ABC (which is not that clear anyway) which has Ugly Betty, Grey's Anatomy and Desperate Housewives. I've bought 3 types of antenna and even bought a HD converter to get clear signal. But at the end, all of these have to be returned as it won't give any significant improvement for me to watch TV.

I followed a lot of series and sitcoms. From 90210, Grey's Anatomy, Ugly Betty, Desperate Housewives, Prison Break, to reality shows like American Next Top Models, Akademi Fantasia (thanks to Jiwang Torrent), American Idol, and the sitcoms like The Office, 30 Rock, How I Meet Your Mother, Two and a Half Man, and many more. The latest sitcom is The Big Bang Theory (thanks to my friend, Jeff who introduced me to this series). I've finished watching the whole Season 1 in 2 days and now half way through Season 2.

But, next semester, I'm going to subscribe cable. Just a basic one will do so I don't have to wait to watch in their website or download it. No one will stop me now. I don't care.

However, there's few series that I've stopped watching since I came here which are CSI and Criminal Minds. The thing is when you were watching in Malaysia, you know all that gruesome murders happened thousand miles from you. But now, I'm at this particular place where the stories took place. I know it's fictional but somehow it's based from true stories too. I have been reading too much about real murders before this that I know there are some people out there who is psycho. Even in Malaysia we have this kind of people. Remember Nurin?

Durham not exactly the safest city in US. In fact, based from City-data.com, Durham crime index is above the average of US crime index. You don't have to be a genius to see that. Just take a bus and stop at the downtown, you know what I mean. I pray everyday to Allah to protect me.

Ok, what crime has to do with being a TV junkie. Out of topic, as usual.

Ps: Ok, I'm bored. I should start packing my stuff, but I'm so lazy to do that. But I've bought boxes at Home Depot for only $0.67 each. Yeay for me!

Pps: Maybe I should swim at Duke gym to improve my stamina so my body won't be in shock when she hits the salt water end of this month. Did I tell you that scuba plan is on again. Double yeay for me!

Craiglist & me

Typical Craiglist shopping experience:

Me: Is the chair is available?
Seller: Yes, please come after 6 pm or tomorrow before 5 pm.
Me: Ok, I'll come at 6.15 pm today. What's your address?

Me: *Wait* *Wait* *No reply*

Seller: *At 6.05 pm*. Oh, the chair has been bought.

WTH?

Twice today I have this experience. Is this a sign for me to stop shopping?

And why all free stuff is in Raleigh and Cary? Nobody in Durham is generous enough to give away free stuff?

Retail therapy

I never know the power of retail therapy until now especially in States. Shopping has become my therapy in overcoming loneliness, boredom and anger. I won't go to the expensive stores coz not able to buy would lead to sadness. The purpose of therapy is to cure not to add salt to the wound.

So after class I would go shopping. Like twice a week. Then weekend is another trip. Most of the time I don't buy anything or I just buy something cheap to feel that I don't waste so much time. I don't care if you feel pathetic or what but it's how I survived for 4 months alone here.

Because of this activity, I don't mind spending hours at one store by just looking around. I know it's waste of time but rather than feeling blues and depress, at least I'm happy. And the positive side of it, I have many cheap but beautiful clothes that you really need to dig to find that treasure.

The retail therapy doesn't have to be at brick and mortar stores, it can be online too. Back home, Amazon and eBay won't send the items there and you have to time 3.6 to get the real price but here, you can buy everything and you don't need to time 3.6 (sometimes I do just to compare the price). Craiglist is another favourite site of mine. Since right now is the season of students moving out, many items are very cheap. Luckily I don't have a truck, if not I would have couch, futon, bed, drawer ready for fall semester.

But right now, after discovering a free place to store my stuff (thanks to William), I started to collect my own furniture to be ready for new apartment in next semester. The thing is all the stuff is so cheap and I know I won't find this cheap stuff in the beginning of semester when everybody is looking for same stuff as me. Right now, I'm buying things that can fit my car. If only a couch can fit into my car...

I wish this angry feeling will go away soon. Before I started buying more stuff. Like iPod Touch.

Ps: Goat's milk taste the same no matter if it's in raw form of powder form. Don't get cheated by the 'creamy, great tasting' tagline. Well, have to endure it for the sake of stronger immunization against swine flu.

Bullshit

There goes my dream of getting scuba diving license.
There goes my sandy white beach summer holiday.

So much for following your dream and living the present. It's bullshiiiiiiiiiiittt.
Your dream remain a dream and your life dictated by others.

How time are wasted on thinking of this stuff.
How energy are wasted on feeling happy and excited.
It's all bullshiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittt.

Maybe I should just forget all this scuba things.
Too many obstacles.
But this last one was the final straw. The reason is so stupid to digest.

Suddenly all the happy feeling of going back is gone. At this moment, I felt like returning all the stuff I bought for everybody. I felt like I just want to stay here. Nobody really care about my ideas anyway. Not in class, not in the family.

I felt like a SHIT. And now I felt angry.

And she didn't even come to my wedding. Both occasion.

WHY SHOULD I EVEN CARE COMING TO HER F**KING WEDDING????????????????????

Can't wait

Of Choki and us

Today supposed to be a productive day which I'm going to study the whole day. However, the day was started with really unpleasant pain that at that moment I was thinking who I'm going to call if I'm real pain.

So I did what's best. SMS my hubby and as usual it's really helpful. And end up sleeping the whole morning till afternoon. Then mom called and added more happiness even though the pain still resided. But not so much anymore. Then got MMS from hubby with Choki pictures in his new leash. Really funny and made my day even better. Then hubby called and told me the story about Choki and the leash I send (finally arrived after I don't know how many weeks).

Hubby's choice of words of decribing things Choki did really funny and made me think hard how exactly Choki did whatever hubby descibed. How Choki did 'muka ketat'? Or how Choki did 'muka marah' and 'muka penyu'? I can relate all his antics (well, some of it) coz I have experience that which sometimes really pain in the ass. But when I think about it now, that's made him Choki or maybe he followed the example of us. Children learned by watching their parents right. Haha.

The thing that having a something that we love together really bond us. Now I know why people said children can bond the couple more. Coz we channel our love to them and together we have so many to share. I mean after so many years of marriage we might have nothing to talk about. So we can talk about our children beside our day of course.

For us the first step is having this little creature. It's a practice to see how patience and tolerance us as a couple before proceed to next level which is a child with our own DNA. As far as I see it, Zainal would be more patient in gaining the trust and making it love you back while me get impatient when he doesn't want me. But Zainal is very strict when disciplining him while I'm more lay-back. Zainal more into quantity time together while I'm into quality time together. Even though he spends a lot of time with him, but I was the one who discovered he has stomach gas (I was so happy about this discovery coz I thought I didn't know anything about him..hehe). And both of us seems to lavish him with ntah-ape-ape.

Well, he lives to 1 year plus right now so I guess we are doing good. I remember Zainal told me that we need to make sure he lives at least 3 months with us if not we are wasting our money. Well, early next month would 1 year he's with us. Wow, 1 year already with that bunny.

Oh, actually I wanted to say that I have no mood to study after this pain (which I suspected from eating 3 minutes Kroger pizza) which is very bad considering my exam is in 2 days but why I ended up writing about Choki and us? Well, thinking about Zainal's stories on Choki which actually made me laugh alone and at least cheer me up lately.

When my IT specialist woke up

Him: I have the same problem with Firefox.

Me: Is Bitdefender the only anti virus have this problem? Hmm.. I found there's a website to download the patch for this .dll.

Him: Did you try it?

Me: No.I'm scared it's not safe. Have you tried it?

Him: I just woke up ok. Let me see what I can do.

Me: Ok, please tell me when you are done.

2 minutes after that.

Him: Ok, I can use my Firefox again.

Me: What? Only 2 minutes? I took the whole morning and still couldn't get anything.

Him: Well, that's different between IT person and non-IT person.

Me: -_-

Conclusion: Well, I don't care as long as I can use my Firefox. Yeay!

Too angry to have a title

I'm so mad today at Bitdefender. I don't know what it did but apparently I can't open my Firefox browser. WTH??? There's a notice saying that one of the component is missing or something. So when I wanted to re-installing Firefox, Bitdefender block the same .dll that been missing in Firefox and of course the it couldn't install properly and having the same problem. Currently Bitdefender claimed it's a trojan.

I tried to retrieve all my bookmarks but I couldn't find the bookmark file where Firefox usually save it. The only next thing to do is to uninstall Firefox and re-install. But I will lost all my bookmarks. Damn it.

However, I was thinking of disable Bitdefender and re-install Firefox. Maybe that work. But I'm not sure if this .dll is really a trojan that could harm my laptop or another Bitdefender ultra protection kind of thing. Yes, Bitdefender also categorized Duke email is harmful. What a nuisance.

What I really mad is the possibility of losing my bookmarks. I bookmarked a lot of thing ok. From important website for Duke, all the houses that I wanted to contact for Fall semester, photoshop tips, Lumix LX3 tips, blogs that I stalked, Low Yat's thread that I follows, some websites for my assignment and many more la. Now I have to find one by one ke? When time I had to surf internet is limited due to exams next week, stuff like this happened. Sape tak marah?

Now I'm using Explorer which I don't really like. Slow, no spelling check, have weird sound which I hate... ahhh... but on brighter side, at least I have a browser. Hehe..

Ok, I need to wait my IT specialist to wake up to ask him what I should do now. Apparently his advice in 3 sentences SMS doesn't make sense to me when I tried to follow it just now.

Hmmm.. how I wish he's here right now. Uh-uh, I realized that I have depend on him too much on IT-related problem has made me nearly-blind IT (buta IT, hehe) and not up to date with current issues anymore. Yes, when you married, you let go some and let the other half take it while you focus on other things. Ye, alasan semata-mata. Haha..

Ps: on brighter side, it's not that you have to re-format the whole laptop which will lose a whole lot more. So please stay calm and look at the bright side ye.

Being Willy Wonka

Dear family members,

I regret to inform you that I didn't buy many things for you coz well, you know student life. Money always spend on somewhere else. But fear not coz.... to be continued...

Dear Kroger,

Please stop selling cheap chocolate. It drive me crazy and at the same time emptying my bank account. And stop selling supercheap chocolate after some events. Like Easter. With cute bunnies. Chocolate. Combination that drive me crazy.

Like just now, I just wanted to buy eggs. Yes, eggs. 6 eggs for $0.99. But why on earth I have to pay $38 when I checked out? This is all you fault. This is because.... to be continued....

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Yes dear family members.... I bought all of these for you.... be prepared to get fat...hahhaha... I hope I didn't create another diabetes patient in the house.To tell the truth, I didn't notice that I bought this much chocolate. I just collected chocolate whenever I go to Kroger. OMG Kroger is so evil. Can you believe I have 3 kg of M&M's. But I love going to Kroger even though they didn't have Sara Lee bread & Arizona Sweet Tea and their Nesquick is more expensive and doesn't have stawberry flavour. But still I love going to Kroger.

but wait... this is mine.. I randomly picked the Snickers and when I got home I realized it was 4 different design. So cute. Should buy more. No. Stop buying chocolate!

Thanks to you Kroger... now I look like Willy Wonka.

But wait, dear family members, there's a catch. Whoever isn't at the arrival gate at 6.30am on 16th May 2009, well, I guess you can just watch us eat the chocolates. Hehe.

Oh-uh, I just realized I haven't bought Mak & Abah's favourite chocolate. Another reason to buy chocolate again. And maybe more that cute Snickers. Haha.

Ps: I just realized that the countdown counter at the sidebar is counting days now. Not months & weeks. Can't wait!!

In auto mode

I felt disengaged these past few days. I felt like my movements were in auto mood and my mind was at somewhere else. It's like watching my body walking and doing whatever she needed to do while my mind wonders elsewhere. Yes, seriously.

Like yesterday, I woke up late and in normal right of mind, I should be rushing to catch the bus. But I wasn't. I just did my stuff in the normal speed of someone who doesn't need to rush.

What the hell is happening here? Why my mind is imagining the future without living the present?

Maybe for some reasons, my subconscious mind has ready to go home. She's having the visions what's going to happen and unintentionally bring me to that kind of world where current activities doesn't matter anymore.

My mind has brought me to various locations and showed one scene to another scene in incoherent mode. Everything from family, friends, hope and dreams just jumble up together creating a really messy scene.

Then, I started to miss my friends. I called my best friend last night and I missed our conversation. Suddenly I wanted to go back to the days where we were unattached. I would crashed at her house and talk girly stuff all night long. We made fun of each other and laughed it all. We bare our darkest secrets (really really dark secrets) and trust each other with all our heart. But that things would not happened again. She's waiting to give birth anytime soon, in fact it was 5 days overdue. And me, thousands miles away from home.

Funnily, I missed hanging out with Zainal's friends too coz they are so loud and hilarious. WTH?

Right now, I need to focus. I need a director to cut out all these bloopers and unnecessary scenes and focus on now. There's so many things to do and if I'm still in this smoking-weed hippie zone, I'm in deep shit. Deep to the waist kind of shit. No kidding. 2 presentations, 1 business plan, 1 final report and 2 final exams kind of mess I'm talking about here.

Ok, I need Steven Spielberg in my head right now, with a tight budget and true story screenplay with happy ending. Right now.

Thought of the day

"Why would somebody who just married or less than 6 months wants to get pregnant already? Have they tired of each other that they need another person in their life so soon?"

I need to know that I'm normal for having this thoughts. Or maybe my motherly instinct hasn't kick my senses yet. I know I will have it, not so soon but not that far.

Kesan migrain untuk hari ini

Soalan untuk hari ini:

Ada tak orang mati kerana terlalu rindukan seseorang?

Harap takde, oleh itu saya tahu saya tak akan mati.
Tapi kalau benda ini boleh berlaku, harap ada, oleh itu saya tidak menjadi yang pertama.

Ps: Apa yang cuba saya merepekkan ini? Pergi sambung balik baca buku teks undang-undang intelektual yang masih ada 70 mukasurat yang belum terbaca untuk esok punya peperiksaan.

Pps: Nasib baik saya bukan peguam atau pelajar undang-undang.

Ppps: Sekarang baru saya sedar bahawa belajar di meja belajar tidak menyakitkan belakang seperti belajar di atas katil. Tapi apakan daya, bilik terlalu sejuk untuk tidak duduk dalam selimut sepanjang masa. Nasib baik bila peperiksaan menjelma, cuaca menjadi panas sedikit.

Pppps (rasa macam tengah buat pembezaan pula): Oh, peperiksaan saya tinggal kurang sebulan. Nasib baik saya ada 2 matapelajaran sahaja yang ada peperiksaan. Namun, matapelajaran undang-undang ada peperiksaan tiap-tiap minggu di mana setiap minggu saya perlu baca 100++ mukasurat dan semua markah itu akan dijadikan markah akhir. Malang, ye saya tahu. Lebih malang lagi, saya tidak ada minggu pembacaan, maknanya selepas minggu terakhir kelas, minggu depannya minggu peperiksaan.

Ppppps: Sila sedih untuk saya kerana saya tidak mahu sedih. (Ceh, cakap selepas seharian bersedih-sedihan sehingga tidak pergi ke kelas kerana kena migrain pula).

Ok, patut tamat sekarang.